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Lindsay Lohan Refuses to Read Reviews for Liz & Dick

A photo of Lindsay Lohan

Actually, Lindsay refuses to read any reviews of her work. It might be because the last time she got a positive review was when she was in Parent Trap, but regardless, that’s her stance. She claims that negative reviews “take away from her experience” of filming, which is ridiculous, because all her bad reviews do is tell the truth.

Do you want to know why we’re talking about this right now? It’s because the very first review came in for Liz Dick. And it’s a doozy.

Let’s check out some of the highlights:

The Lifetime movie starring Lindsay Lohan as Elizabeth Taylor is half train wreck, half “SNL” skit.

It should come as no great surprise that Lifetime’s Liz Dick movie starring Lindsay Lohan is spectacularly bad.

Lohan is woeful as Taylor from start to finish. But, whatever you do, don’t miss Liz Dick. It’s an instant classic of unintentional hilarity. Drinking games were made for movies like this. And the best part is that it gets worse as it goes on, so in the right company with the right beverages, Liz Dick could be unbearably hilarious toward the tail end of the 90-minute running time. By the time Lohan is playing mid-’80s Taylor and it looks like a lost Saturday Night Live skit, your body may be cramped by convulsions.

The talking part doesn’t turn out so well for Lohan. There is not one minute in this film where she’s believable.

At one point, Lohan has to shout, “I won’t live without you!” and then run down a hall. It’s like a high school play. She then tries to kill herself with booze and pills. If this starts to seem like a good idea to you, it’s time to switch the channel.

Lohan as Taylor was a bad idea in the dramatic sense, but it’s pure genius both for marketing and for belly laughs and drinking games.

The review also mentions that the movie has these interview breaks, where there’s not an actual story happening, just Lindsay doing interviews to the camera as Elizabeth Taylor. This movie is going to be amazing.

We’ll all be watching this, right?

Quad-Quotables: The Coolest W Shoot I’ve Ever Seen

photo of scarlett johansson pictures

“Chris Farley[was my favorite person of the 90’s]. I thought he was hilarious. Growing up, I used to watch Saturday Night Live just to see him. He threw his whole body into the parts he played: He’d become red and sweaty and frantic. When he died, it was really significant for me.”

photo of mia wasikowska pictures

“Madonna [is the icon of the 80’s]. She’s the icon. She’s wholly her own person.”

photo of keira knightley pictures

“I think skinny jeans and micro-miniskirts are very unfriendly. I’ve been known to wear both, but on some days it seems like they were invented to make you feel bad about yourself.”

photo of rooney mara pictures

“Paper Moon [is my favorite 70’s movie]. I saw it only last year. David [Fincher] made me watch it, and I think I’ve seen it five times since then… I love that ending—it’s not too happy-happy.”

Well that was kind of neat, huh? And how about these pictures? God, Rooney Mara doesn’t even look like Rooney Mara.


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Daniel Craig’s SNL Promos Aren’t The First Time This James Bond Has Cracked Us Up

We absolutely love when Saturday Night Live gives normally serious actors a chance to prove their comedic chops — and sometimes we even love it when they don’t. From the looks of his promos with Taran Killam, this week’s host, Daniel Craig, has a good shot at falling into the former category. His whiny “I don’t like guns” kills us almost as much as the silly montage at the end. This got us wondering if this was really the first time we’d seen the gorgeous Brit do comedy — Layer Cake, Munich, Casino Royale and The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo certainly aren’t knee-slappers. Earlier this summer, he did mention to The Sun that his next Bond flick, Skyfall, would actually have some humorous moments, after making two 007 movies that completely ignored the franchise’s campy origins.

“I think there are some very funny lines in it but then I have a very dark sense of humour, so others might not agree with me,” he told the paper. Asked for what else the movie offered, he said, “Go-go dancers. It’s not something I have done before and I thought it was about time I showed that part of myself.”

But after a bit of searching, we did find one rather hilarious skit Craig did back in 2007, for the British charity Comic Relief. It stars him as himself and Catherine Tate as a woman who met him on an online dating site.

We also rather enjoyed Daniel’s visit to The Colbert Report last December, where he didn’t exactly crack jokes, but we got to see his glorious smile as the host challenged him to arm wrestle. And, of course, who can forget James Bond’s appearance at this summer’s Olympics, where he escorted Queen Elizabeth II via parachute to the Opening Ceremonies. It’s not ROTFLMAO material, to be sure, but we love this evidence of his ability to spoof himself.