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Here’s Lindsay, Calling Her Dad About Cocaine Dina

photo of lindsay lohan drugs pictures crying photo
So normally I don’t run these 911-type calls, because I feel it’s just weird and sad and like listening to people during the worst times of their lives, and while we’re in the business of voyeurism here at Evil Beet, there are some lines that shouldn’t be crossed, right? Well honestly, Lindsay Lohan is exempt from that law, and so we have the call from Lindsay to her dad, Michael Lohan, detailing her physical altercation with her mom, and also some Michael Lohan stuff thrown in there for good measure. Unfortunately, at the time I wrote this post, I was able to embed the audio, and now I can’t, and on that I say ‘f-cksticks’.

Here’s some of the best bits, since you can’t hear it here:

Michael to Lindsay: He’s [the limo driver] kidnapping you, Lindsay, he’s kidnapping you!

Lindsay to Michael: You just tricked me!

Michael to Lindsay: Lindsay, he’s kidnapping you.

Michael to Lindsay: You do everything, you do everything for everyone, you gave Mom 40 thousand [dollars]?

Lindsay to Michael: Dad, she’s on cocaine, she’s like, touching her neck and shit.

Michael to Lindsay: Mom’s in the car with you? Well she’s kidnapping you.

Lindsay to Michael: She said disgusting things to me.

Michael to Lindsay: She’s horrible, Lindsay.

Lindsay to Michael: She’s like the f-cking devil right now.

Here’s Michael’s “message” to Dina:

“Just be the mother that you were when we were married. You were a great mother and a great wife, and I don’t know what happened. But you definitely have some issues that need to be dealt with and I wish you would deal with them.”

Issues, indeed.

Very VH1 Talks Tabloids, Lohan Drama And “Mystery Blonds”

Today on Very VH1…It’s Wednesday, which means we’ll be dissecting all the latest tabloid stories with our Way/No Way game, deciding which ones we think are true and which ones are total BS (hint: almost all of them). Also, the Lohans act like Lohans, drunk-fighting until 911 is called, and Robert Pattinson is once again causing a stir for doing the unthinkable — talking to a member of the opposite sex in a bar. Yes, Very VH1 is jam-packed with topics and we can’t wait to hear YOUR thoughts, today — live! — at 2PM est. Watch us below and click on the tab in the upper righthand corner to join in the chat.

Rosie O’Donnell Had a Heart Attack

photo of rosie o'donnell pictures photos
And she nearly died. From Rosie’s personal blog:

its a semi-sunny monday
the light bouncing off the flat hudson
mish is sitting next to me
i am happy to be alive

last week i had a heart attack

here is what happened
on tuesday morning
while walking in a parking lot in nyack
i heard a loud commanding voice

“can u help me”

more of a demand than request
a challenge – a plea
i turned and saw an enormous woman
struggling to get out of her car

she was stuck

“can u help me? she asked again
as i walked toward her
“oh u r rosie odonnell”
yes i am

the ghost of christmas future
me – if i did not wake
there r no accidents i thought
as i braced myself and lifted her

it was not easy
but together we did it
she was up and on her way
with gratitude

a few hours later my body hurt
i had an ache in my chest
both my arms were sore
everything felt bruised

muscular – i thought
strained or pulled tissue
i went about my day
the pain persisted

i became nauseous
my skin was clammy
i was very very hot
i threw up

maybe this is a heart attack
i googled womens heart attack symptoms
i had many of them
but really? – i thought – naaaa

i took some bayer aspirin
thank god
saved by a tv commercial
literally

i did not call 911
50% of women having heart attacks never call 911
200,000 women die of heart attacks
every year in the US

by some miracle i was not one of them
the next day i went to a cardiologist
the dr did an EKG and sent me to the hospital
where a stent was put in

my LAD was 99% blocked
they call this type of heart attack
the Widow maker
i am lucky to be here

know the symptoms ladies
listen to the voice inside
the one we all so easily ignore
CALL 911

save urself
xxx

Horrifying. I am so, so glad that Rosie’s OK. I can’t even imagine how scary this must have been, and I marvel at how genuinely thankful she sounds in this, her poem, to still be alive.


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